As mentioned last week, I’m taking a course from John Gray (the Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus author) and having my eyes opened. For this series, I’m sharing some gems from his 28 books and countless lectures.
How Relationships Really Work
Here is the question from last week:
If, while she is talking, he looks distracted, her best response is:
a. Stop talking
b. Ask him why he’s not listening
c. Ask him if he’s thinking
d. Ask him what he’s thinking about
I heard from many of you, but no one got it “right” according to Gray’s extensive research. Answer a could end up with resentments, b will most likely shut him down, for d he may not be able to answer, so c is the best option. It is a simple, non-threatening question. While she is in her heart zone, he is in his head, and her pointing that out can help him refocus.
Here is our question for next week:
Men will usually respond best to which of the following versions of a request:
a. Could you please take out the trash?
b. Would you please take out the trash?
c. I noticed the trash hasn’t been taken out yet.
d. Please don’t make me take out the trash.
Feel free to reply to this email with your best guess!
If you’re interested in a booking a workshop or joining my group coaching on this topic, email me here.